[00:00:00] Speaker A: Welcome to Align to lead. I'm Dr. Megan Parks and today we're talking about real solutions for women's health, healing and balance.
You're watching now Media Television.
Welcome to Align to lead. I'm Dr. Megan Parks and today we're talking about a leadership challenge that millions of families are quietly navigating every day. And that's caregiving.
Across the country, more professionals are balancing careers, businesses, parenting and leadership responsibilities while caring for aging parents, spouses, or even loved ones. At the same time, we're seeing a rising in conversation about burnout, elder care, dementia, support and aging in place, and the emotional toll that caregiving can take on families.
Joining me today is Melanie Christensen, owner of A Better Solution and Home Care in Las Vegas. Melanie has been married to her husband Kent for 38 years and together they raised four children and now are enjoying life with six grandchildren. And after spending 30 years as a stay at home mom, Melanie found herself searching for a new purpose. And once her children were gone, she started saying, what is my new why?
So following the loss of her parents, she unfortunately experienced firsthand the impact of hospice and the, the personal care attendance that can basically take a toll both on the clients and the families during the life's pretty much the most difficult transitions that they're ever going to experience.
That experience inspired Melanie and Kent to purchase a better solution in home care in 2021. Since then, they have helped more than 250 clients, providing compassionate support, dignity and care during the later stages of life's journey.
In this first segment, I want to explore why caregiving has become one of the biggest invisible pressures affecting professionals, leaders and families today. Melanie, I'm so glad you're here.
[00:02:04] Speaker B: Thank you. I'm so excited to be on with you today.
[00:02:08] Speaker A: Awesome. Well, Melanie, first off, after spending 30 years taking care of your own family, what inspired you to step into home health care and family support?
[00:02:20] Speaker B: You know, I think that's such a great question because I didn't ever really expect to have a career. My whole life, I just dreamt of being a mom and I was so lucky to be able to do that. So when that ended, I was surprised by the feeling of what do I do next?
And, and as my parents aged and I watched them pass and the support that we got from hospice and care facilities and caregivers, I just knew that that was something that I needed to be part of.
And it's really been kind of a natural progression for me to be able to help my children, watch them grow and progress and spread their wings and fly away to now helping families who are watching their loved ones in this final chapter of their lives.
[00:03:30] Speaker A: I love that when you actually find your passion, it doesn't become a job, it becomes a life's mission. It becomes a purpose.
It fills you up rather than depletes you. And I just absolutely love that you found that for yourself.
What are you seeing right now in families that tells you that caregiving pressures are becoming more intense than ever?
[00:03:51] Speaker B: You know, when I meet with families, I see the look of her almost hurt and fear and maybe some hopelessness.
And then we'll talk about what we can do to help them.
They're not in this alone. There are so many resources available.
And once we start to talk to them about what our company can do, but then what other resources are available to help them, you kind of see that weight start to lift off their shoulders and a little bit of light starts shining their eyes again. And. And you can just see that life becomes a little less difficult and scary when we know what's available.
[00:04:46] Speaker A: I love that. I do believe it's the fear of unknown. And as I mentioned to you right before we got on, my own parents navigated taking care of my grandma, so there was a lot of unknown, what resources, what support system. So I love that you're able to tackle that for people now with that. Why do you see that so many professionals struggle silently when they become caregivers for their aging loved ones?
[00:05:14] Speaker B: You know, I think professionals, you think about a professional's daily life, it's full, it's fast paced, it's busy, and suddenly they have this other new, maybe unexpected responsibility that demands attention. And honestly, a responsibility that they might feel like they want to do more than their profession. And yet they've got to still have their job to survive.
But this loved one is in such dire need that suddenly they really have to sort of squeeze out what they can do for each, each area of their life.
And they probably feel like they're not giving everything to any part of their life. And that's hard. You. Everybody wants to feel like they're giving their best, giving their all to everything they're doing. And when you become very drawn, very separated or multitasking in too many areas, it starts to feel like we're not really accomplishing anything.
[00:06:36] Speaker A: Well, no, you're saying that perfectly. I feel like we're hearing more and more conversations nationally about this aging in place and basically senior independence. You hear that so many much when you turn on the news and when you hear different things, why do you feel that this is becoming such an important topic, especially now, today?
[00:06:58] Speaker B: Well, with baby boomers, our society is aging and we can extend life, but we don't always have the ability to extend the quality of life.
And so as society is getting older, people do want to age in place. They want to be able to stay at home. They're not always physically or mentally able to do that.
And so as caregivers, people have to figure out what that looks like. How do we help them stay at home while still maintaining the rest of our lives?
[00:07:39] Speaker A: What do you wish truly that more people understood when it comes to the emotional reality that families face when a loved one begins needing the support?
[00:07:52] Speaker B: First of all, they need to understand they do not have to do this alone. And in fact, they probably cannot do it alone. This is a hard, hard thing.
My dad lived to be 96.
He was such a good man. He was the best dad.
My mom died when she was 84 and he was 85 and he lived alone for a year after she died.
And then he moved in with one of my sisters and she took great care of him. I just totally love.
[00:08:25] Speaker A: It happens. It happens.
I feel, oh, absolutely. I mean, just again, how they're the emotional realities, what kind of tools it takes. And I feel like even when we're talking in a stress manner, a lot of people do not realize that they're hitting burnout. And so what kind of things do you see on an emotional toll, a mental toll, and even a professional toll before they're actually even realizing that they're in the stress response?
[00:08:56] Speaker B: Okay, so like I said, my, my dad lived with my sister, one of my sisters, and there's so much family around them. I lived far away, but they have a lot of family right there nearby. And, and yet the sister that he lived with was the one that really carried the weight of that responsibility.
We started to see she wasn't getting enough sleep, she didn't have enough energy to play with her grandkids. She's still employed, so she still had to go and teach school and try to be a good teacher to her classroom full of kids who needed her.
For my dad, the stress really could be seen in that he knew he was a stress. He knew that she was taking care of him and that was hard on him.
And, and that's kind. It's that two sided.
I want to take care of you, but I'm really stressed out. And then the one that's being cared for, seeing I need your help, but I really don't like being a burden and trying to figure out how to get those feelings to all work together to build relationships and to help us through this final journey is tough.
[00:10:21] Speaker A: Oh, absolutely. I mean, you said it really perfect. You're not alone, but so many people feel alone. And I love that you recognized again, your sister because she was there and she was able to, you recognize like, what a blessing and how good she did. Because I feel like sometimes the caregivers in those situations, they don't feel like it's almost like, well, you're supposed to or that's how they're feeling. It is.
[00:10:47] Speaker B: You know, when my dad had to go to a care facility for the last four months of his life, he went to memory care. And when they went looking for a place for him, my sister was just really broken that she could no longer take care of him.
And the, the person at the care facility said, listen, you will always be his advocate, but now instead of being his caregiver, you get to be his daughter. And I think lifting that off of her and allowing her to resume her role as his daughter really was such a gift for her to be able to just enjoy the last few months of his life instead of worrying about his safety and, well, being Melanie.
[00:11:33] Speaker A: I love that. Well, coming up next, I'm getting practical about what quality in home care actually looks like and how families can make confident decisions without feeling overwhelmed. We'll be right back with more practical tools to help you feel healthier, stronger and more aligned. Stay tuned.
And we're back. I'm Dr. Megan Parks and this is Aligned to Lead on Now Media Television.
Stay connected to this show and every other NOW Media favorite, live or on demand, anytime you like. Download the free Now Media TV app on Roku or iOS and unlock non stop bilingual programming both in English and in Spanish. On the move. No problem. Catch the episode on the podcast
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welcome back to Align to Lead.
I'm here with Melanie Christensen. And now I want to focus one of one of the fastest growing conversations happening across healthcare and family, and that is aging in place.
More families are choosing to keep loved ones at home for as long as possible instead of just moving them immediately into a facility.
But while that sounds ideal, emotionally a lot of us get stuck into the logistics of it and it becomes overwhelming. So such as families often don't know where to start or what support is available or even how to know when the additional care is truly needed.
So in this segment, I want to make this practical and empowering for Viewers who may be navigating or soon to be navigating these decisions.
So, Melanie, for viewers hearing the phrase aging in place, what does that mean?
[00:13:22] Speaker B: Aging in place means that we're going to stay at home for our lives instead of going to an assisted living or an adult living community.
But it also means that we may need to do some planning ahead.
Is our home the kind of place that we will be able to age in place? Do we have a lot of stairs? Stairs can become dangerous. They also can be good for exercise and staying in shape. But is that going to be something that in our later years we're going to be able to navigate? Do we have a shower? Do we have a bathtub?
Do we have tripping hazards throughout our house? These are things that we can look ahead at and think, if I need a walk in tub, I need to plan ahead for that.
I need to plan ahead for maybe when I can't drive anymore, how am I going to get my groceries or go to the doctor or whatever that looks like? There's just a lot of planning ahead that we need to do and communication that needs to go into it with our families before we're really going to be able to make sure that we're ready to age in place.
[00:14:38] Speaker A: I love that because again, it becomes empowering rather than just, this is, this is awful. I don't know what to do. And I, I love the thought process. I love the little nuggets of, you know, it's never too early to start.
With that being said, what are some of the earliest signs that you see or a family maybe should pay attention to that allows them to know that their loved one may need a little bit extra support?
[00:15:06] Speaker B: That's a great question. Things that we might want to start looking for are, maybe our loved one isn't showering, maybe their oral care is suffering, or they're not eating good anymore. Maybe their house is a little messy.
Anything, I guess, look for change, whatever starts to be different in their lives.
Is it a good change or is it something that might indicate a little bit of a decline that we should be aware of and ready to address before it's a big decline and we're in crisis mode?
[00:15:47] Speaker A: You're going right into my next thought. Why do so many people wait until they're in crisis before they ask for help?
[00:15:56] Speaker B: Oh, who wants help?
None of us have to ask for help. We all want to do everything on our own.
That's the way we've been. Our parents raised us to be independent and we've now been independent for 60 years and maybe 70 years and now suddenly we need help. Or if it's our children or our spouse, they as a child or a spouse of someone that's declining, it's hard to admit you need help because is that a reflection on your ability? Is it a reflection on your love for them?
What is it exactly that this is a reflection on?
In reality, it's not a reflection of anything other than this person has had the opportunity to live to be to the age that they need help and you may need help in supplying that help to them.
There's a lot of emotion involved in asking for help.
[00:17:03] Speaker A: I love it because again, it's not a problem. But is this an opportunity? And what a good way to look at. They've made it to this and not many people get to make it to that.
When we talk in home health care, what are some of the myths that you just kind of want to debunk that aren't true at all?
[00:17:25] Speaker B: Well, first of all, I want to clarify there's a difference between home care and home health care.
My company is a home care company, meaning we are completely non medical.
We don't do anything medical and this varies from state to state.
In Nevada, we are so non medical that we don't even clip nails.
So we don't do vitals.
We can't dispense medication. We can do medication reminders, but we, but we don't dispense medication. So understanding the difference between those two things is really important and understanding that those are two resources that are really great resources.
Home health care is going to come in, they're going to check for all of the medical side of things. They're going to check for maybe bed sores or weight loss.
They'll check your heart, your lungs, all of those things that need to be checked to ensure we're doing well.
We have the other side of that in that we're taking care of those ADLs, the activities of daily living to make sure that you're eating well, that your house is clean, your laundry is done, that you are taking your medication because we can monitor that.
So as a, as a team, we make a great health care or a great senior care team.
Myths are that.
The senior or the person in need doesn't have any choice, that we're just going to come in and we're going to take over everything and we're going to and they're going to be like a prisoner in their own home. And that's just not what we do we want that person aging in place to feel like they are still the king or the queen of the castle and we're there to sort of put a little shine in their golden years?
This is not something to. Having home care is not a dreadful thing. It should be something that can be an enrichment to your life that you've worked for and earned.
[00:19:45] Speaker A: That is wonderful. I love that verbiage how you said that. That is great.
Now, obviously, with people living longer, we're seeing more and more of dementia and Alzheimer's and just straight across the board.
So what kind of things do you feel that families should understand when it comes to early support and consistencies with this particular group?
[00:20:10] Speaker B: Well, early support is so important, and I almost feel like it's more important for the family than for the person with dementia. Now, obviously, we want that person getting the help and the support they need as early on as they can.
But there are so many resources out there for families, and I am so impressed by our clients who have dementia. We'll go and serve them. And so often their caregiver is going out to volunteer in the community to help other people who are. Other families who are struggling with dementia or Alzheimer's.
There are. There's the Alzheimer's association that's doing amazing things. They are. They are a great resource.
Also, Medicare, who has not ever been willing to pay for home care, at least for most parts of Medicare, now has the guide program where it offers respite care for the family a limited amount each year.
But knowing those resources really is a great help for the family as they help their parent or spouse or loved one transition through the dementia Alzheimer's process.
Consistency, huge.
People with dementia often feel like their life is out of control, and that consistency helps sort of settle them and bring peace to them. So a consistent, consistent meal times, consistent bedtime and a bedtime pattern is really important. One of our clients has had dementia for 15 years. Her husband's been taking care of her and it has. It's hard on him. She's a flight risk. Like, she escapes fast and she's a wanderer. Well, he found that one of the senior centers in town has a daycare.
And so she goes to daycare for six or seven hours a day. And that consistency for her has been huge. It really has improved her quality of life and it has allowed him to be able to take care of their life while she is also being taken care of.
[00:22:43] Speaker A: That is wonderful, Melanie, for families watching who may need guidance or some simply want to better understand their Options.
Where can people connect with you and learn more about your work?
[00:22:57] Speaker B: Well, we are in the Las Vegas Valley and in Pahrump, so Clark and Clark and Nye county in Nevada.
You could find us on a better solution in home care, Forward slash Summerlin or Absihc Summerlin. Do a Google search for us. You'll find us. We are a franchise, so we have territories across the nation.
And one of the really nice things about being part of a franchise, excuse me, is that we have a backup group of great expertise and experience and consistency across our franchise areas as well.
[00:23:49] Speaker A: Fantastic. Up next, I want to talk about something that often gets overlooked in caregiving conversations, and that's truly the emotional health of the caregiver themselves. We'll be right back with more practical tools to help you feel healthier, stronger and more aligned. Stay tuned.
And we're back. I'm Dr. Megan Parks and this is ALIGNED to LEAD on NOW Media television.
Welcome back to ALIGN to lead. And I'm continuing my conversation with Melanie Christensen. And now I want to focus on a bigger topic, the people who often get disappeared inside the system of the caregiving process, and that's the caregivers themselves. Because let's be honest, behind every caregiver story is going to be a son, a daughter, a spouse, a professional who is exhausted, emotionally overwhelmed, and trying to hold everything together without falling apart themselves.
And what makes this even more difficult is that many caregivers feel guilty. They feel guilty for admitting that they need help or that they're struggling and they are convincing themselves that they should be able to handle it all on their own.
So in this segment, I want to talk honestly about caregiver burnout, emotional exhaustion, and why support systems matter.
Melanie, what are some of the emotional patterns that you see most often in family caregivers?
[00:25:19] Speaker B: Emotional patterns? You know what I feel like when we get to this caregiving point in our lives, everything that has been difficult in our family before is kind of exaggerated now. So if we haven't had very good communication skills, that's going to be a bigger point of concern than it ever has been before.
If our relationships with our, with our loved ones hasn't been great, we're going to have to work on that because that we've got to be able to have good communication and good relationships with them at this point in their lives, 100%.
[00:26:03] Speaker A: Why do you, why do you feel that these caregivers so often feel guilty for asking for help or even guilty for even taking a break?
[00:26:13] Speaker B: Well, none of us, none of us want to admit that we need help.
And for me, I feel like if I truly love someone, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. I've got more, I can give more, I can give more. But there comes a point when we really can't give more and we need to step back and we need to say, guess what? I need a little support here. Whether it's from other family members, from a neighbor, from a church member, from a group of people.
We live in a time that is fast and busy, but we also live in a time when it's easier to find resources now than ever before.
A Google search can help you.
Maybe all you need is some information and you can get that if you do a little bit of searching. If your loved one has dementia and you are just empty, maybe you could find something in doing some research, getting some education on it that will help you be able to navigate the bumpy road that you're on right now.
[00:27:27] Speaker A: No, you made a good point because you even talked about the dementia Alzheimer's patient who lived 15 years with it. And my grandma was the same. And I remember my parents going through that. They felt like I'm raising a three year old, almost like they're like a little kid, but it's an adult and it's my parent and now I have to kind of reprimand mom. And that was kind of a different navigating. And so the stress when we talk about that, so when we're talking stress that comes with caregiving, how do you see that affecting them emotionally, physically, or even other relationships that they may have?
[00:28:08] Speaker B: That's a really good question because it really does affect every aspect of life. Physically, we see it can lead to increased blood pressure, increased heart disease risk or diabetes risk. It can reduce our immune system system emotionally. It takes a toll in just our emotional well being if it goes unchecked. But it can lead to depression and anxiety, isolation, withdrawing from things that we've always enjoyed doing.
And with other relationships it can lead to some resentment, again, isolation, anger and frustration.
Sorry if I said frustration already, but those relationships are so important and I feel like it can especially lead to resentment for people who aren't helping as much as you feel like they should be or could be.
So those things are really important to be upfront about and to, to guard against.
If you, if you're a caregiver and you notice that you don't have as much energy as you used to have, or that maybe you are short tempered and you've never been Short tempered or irritable before, those maybe are warning signs that you need to get some help as well.
Statistically, the caregiver wears out before the one getting cared for.
And then suddenly we have two people that need help instead of just one. So it is really, really important that the caregiver recognizes what's going on in their lives and they get the support that they need 100%.
[00:30:04] Speaker A: And you hit it perfectly. You had even said that problems that you had before, whether it be communication and relationships or just even expectations, if you're not having them on the front end, all of a sudden they're amplified. And then now you're really having to not only deal with being drained, as you mentioned, sometimes they're taking care of their own families or still in a career. And yet then having to take care of mom, dad, spouse, you name it. And it's just a lot of toll on them.
[00:30:39] Speaker B: Yeah, it really is.
[00:30:40] Speaker A: Oh, absolutely. So why is accepting support not weakness, but actually a healthier form of leadership and responsibility?
[00:30:53] Speaker B: Asking for help just is never a weakness.
Most of us are not experts in everything.
And you know, I had a blowout on the road the other day and I was out on the freeway and it's a big busy road and I had to call for help. I tried my hardest to get that tire changed. I couldn't do it. I had to ask for help.
If I want to learn how to cook something that I don't already know how to cook, I've got to turn somewhere for the resources to do that.
Asking for a help, asking for help or assistance is, is a strength. It's empowering.
And it might be a little bit scary. At first I wasn't sure who was going to show up on the side of the road to help me out, but it was empowering once they got there to help me get back on my road.
When we've got a loved one who is declining in that time of life, it's empowering for us to accept the help that we need. Whether it's from the health care facility or health care line of work, or from a home care company, wherever it's coming from. Accepting help is a sign of strength, maturity and humility. We don't know it all and we simply can't do it all.
[00:32:26] Speaker A: I say to a lot of people, we, we are so harsh on ourselves. We are so what we would demand of ourselves, we would never demand from someone else. You know, what we expect for ourselves, we wouldn't expect for someone else. And so many of us want to be able to help others. We want to be able to give support, but we don't know how because nobody's sharing this. These caregivers aren't sharing it.
And I've told people, you almost take the blessing away from that person that could have helped you. And so that kind of allows that control, release, that opportunity and the strength to sometimes ask for help. We are human.
With that being said, what are some practical steps that you feel and you tell other caregivers that they can do right now to protect themselves and protect their well being while still caring deeply for those people?
[00:33:25] Speaker B: You know, the range of caregivers is so broad that that's kind of a hard one to answer. I'm going to assume, assume right now that we're talking about a spouse taking care of their spouse.
The things that they, that's really important for them to do is the self care things.
They need to get exercise, they need to eat well, they need to make sure that their health is being monitored and well taken care of.
Monitor yourself for depression. Depression leads to physical things that are really undesirable and it's so preventable.
Really monitor how you're feeling in every aspect of your life. Are you feeling empty or are you feeling energized and like you've got more to give?
If you start feeling empty, if you start feeling resentful, if you start feeling hopeless, it's time to move quickly to get the help that can help those feelings go away and restore the energy and the light that you want in your life.
[00:34:43] Speaker A: I love that because I was even just thinking, what are some things that they could be looking for to prevent that burnout from happening before their emotional explosion happens, before their body just says, I'm done and the reactive part comes into play.
But yes, anything, anything else that you would like to leave with the audience when it comes to just not feeling alone about, you know, in this time that they're going through.
[00:35:11] Speaker B: Oh, you really are not alone. First of all, so many people are going through it.
Like I said earlier, with the baby boomers aging, our population is aging so quickly.
So many people are dealing with this. And so there, there are so many people that are in your corner.
There are companies that are. That's what we're here for. We're here to help. We're here to enrich your life and to enrich the life of your loved one. We want to make sure that, that people recognize the impact they've had in life throughout their lives. And we want to make sure that in this journey, the final parts of their journey, that they're receiving that care and that reassurance that they've lived a life well.
[00:36:06] Speaker A: I love that. Well, coming up in our final segment, I'm going to bring this full circle. We're going to discuss dignity. We're going to discuss leadership, and we are also going to discuss what compassionate skills support really looks like in today's world. We'll be right back with more practical tools to help you feel healthier, stronger and more aligned. Stay tuned.
And we're back. I'm Dr. Megan Parks and this is Align to Lead on Now Media Television.
If you want more episodes like this, you can watch Now Media TV live or on demand. Download the free Now Media TV app on your Roku or iOS and unlock non stop bilingual programming in both English and Spanish. On the move. No problem. Catch the podcast
[email protected].
welcome back to the final segment of Align to Lead.
I'm here with Melanie Christensen and I want to end this conversation with a bigger perspective because caregiving is ultimately more about more than just healthcare. It's about dignity. It's about humanity, and it's about how we show up for the people during some of the most vulnerable times in their lives.
And Melanie's story not only reflects that beautifully, but it's turning personal loss and life transition into meaningful service for others and other families.
And in many ways, caregiving reflects the deepest form of leadership there is, and that is being present, being compassionate, dependable, and willing to support others through uncertainty.
Now, Melanie, we were talking about dignity.
How does your company really come alongside these people, navigating it and allowing them to have dignity in the process?
[00:37:59] Speaker B: I love that question.
Preserving dignity.
Dignity is the inherent inalienable worth and value of every human being. It is not earned or achieved. It is possessed from birth.
We all have that dignity within us and it is our responsibility. It is our privilege. It should be our life's journey, our life's aim to help preserve dignity for everybody that we come in contact with.
Doing that for seniors is such a blessing and I'm so thankful that I can do that as part of, as part of my career.
In our assessment packet that we take out, we establish the care plan. We go through all of the legal paperwork for the state and for all of that. But one of our documents is the client's Bill of Rights.
And in that Bill of Rights, we talk about the inherent value of every human being and how important it is that we protect that.
We always will treat our clients with dignity and respect and honor them as a human being, that's just so important.
[00:39:26] Speaker A: I love that because I think sometimes when we go through this process, it's the fear. It's the fear of being treated as less than. It's the fear of getting every right taken from you. So I love that you're able to hit that now. If families were able to please.
[00:39:47] Speaker B: It's adding that to a time of life that is already scary.
Your life is transitioning into something that is very unfamiliar and that's really scary. And if we can have somebody by our side that is cheering us on, that is recognizing us as a really important person and someone who has got something left to give.
What a gift. What an honor.
[00:40:18] Speaker A: I love that.
What changes do you see when family members, if they're even able to, but they can look at this time of caregiving as compassion rather than panic.
[00:40:33] Speaker B: Gosh, you know what, that's hard. And I feel like it might be really easy to say, well, just put yourself in that situation.
Well, they're in their situation and it is a really difficult situation to be in.
So I think, you know, supporting them when we, when we've got a friend or someone that we know that we're close to, who is helping, excuse me, helping someone as a caregiver, support them, reach out to them, lift them, however you can lift them, they need it. And compassion, as we show compassion to them, it's going to then give them more compassion to share with the, with the one that they're caring for.
I think we all want to be compassionate.
We all feel like we would be compassionate if we were in their shoes.
But being a caregiver, I feel like, is sort of like trying to explain to someone what 120 degrees with 80 or 90% humidity feels like. You hear that and you're like, ugh, that's really hot and humid. But not until you open the door and fill that blast furnace of heat hit you in the face do you recognize what 120 degrees with 80 or 90% humidity feels like.
Not until we are the caregiver do we understand what true compassion feels like and looks like and the struggle to maintain that when life gets really darn hard.
So if you happen to know someone who's a caregiver, reach out to them with your compassion and help strengthen them so that they've got more compassion to give
[00:42:39] Speaker A: love that. And in an early segment, we were talking about that crisis when it happens, and ideally having a conversation ahead of time, ideally having that Communication.
How can families hit those conversations? Because let's be honest, they're difficult. Nobody wants to say, hey mom, hey dad, hey spouse, what do you want to do if, you know, we kind of would rather ignore it. But the problem is it's not if it's going to come, it's usually when it's going to come. So when we talk about that, how do we, I don't know, how do we go about having those difficult conversations about aging, about independence, about what support looks like for them?
[00:43:28] Speaker B: I think just like aging in place, it's one of those things that's best done when we plan ahead for it. It's easier to have those conversations before mom or dad or your spouse is in the hospital and they can't walk anymore.
Start early, start to say, mom and dad, what does independence look like for you? And how do you want us to prepare for that? How do you want us to handle it when we don't think you're safe to drive anymore, or when we don't feel like it's wise for you to live on your own anymore?
Kind of play the what if game and find out beforehand. It really is about discussing these things before it happens.
When it does happen and, and you haven't discussed it, you have to go gentle, be kind, really dig deep for that compassion. Because like we've said, it can be scary and, and it's scary for the caregiver as well, but, and, or for the one being cared for as well. But really try and find, plan ahead, look down the road.
If you've got a spouse, talk about it. What are we going to do if, or when this happens?
What, what does, what does this look like?
What, what do you want me to do? If you fall and break your hip and you need a wheelchair or, and that's a pretty minor event actually, unless you're the one with the broken hip. But you know, those long term things, really try and, and talk about them before they happen.
[00:45:19] Speaker A: No, I love that because it, I feel like, especially for the, the person who is going through this, not just the caregiver, I mean, looking at it, both perspectives, the one person, they feel like they're losing control, as you said, they feel like they have no rights. They feel like, what's going on? I live this life, life, and now you're taking everything from me. And then the person making those choices or is the caregiver.
It's hard. It's hard making some hard, difficult decisions and, and wondering am I making the right decision or even, even Some of the hard decisions that you don't want to be in charge of. But you know that that's what the person truly would want if that was the, if they were going through that.
I love that empowering conversation with that. I absolutely love that.
Shifting into overall wellness when we're talking for seniors, what role does companionship and even emotional connection play?
[00:46:17] Speaker B: Oh my gosh, it's huge. Going back to my dad when he lived with my sister was kind of an ideal situation because she's a schoolteacher. Her husband worked graveyards. So my dad was never alone one. Either my sister or my brother in law were always home with him. Well then my brother in law's schedule changed and he was working days. So my dad was home alone during the day.
My sister would leave food in the fridge for him and she would get home and he hadn't eaten. And so she called Meals on Wheels and talk to them about the situation to see if they could bring food. And they said we can absolutely bring food.
But more important than food is human interaction that is so important.
So I think for the caregiver and for the, for the client, as we call them, the client, that human interaction is so important.
If, if the client is still able to get out and go to the senior center or go to a movie, go to the library, go do something where people are, go sit at the park, maybe go to a care center and participate in the programs they have there or the community center where they have guest speakers or activities there. Get out and meet people.
Human interaction is so important for our emotional well being even for introverts. I am a huge introvert and we all need that human interaction for our emotional well being.
[00:48:10] Speaker A: Thank you so much for that reminder, Melanie. This has been such an important and valuable conversation.
Where can viewers follow your work or connect with your team or continue learning more about compassionate and home health care
[00:48:27] Speaker B: on social media? A better solution in home care. Summerlin, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube.
Just all those social media places.
Again, you can go to our website. You could call us if you want to. Our Phone number is 702-765-0520.
We are here to ask answer questions to, to lift a load however we can. We just really want to serve and help people.
[00:49:05] Speaker A: Melanie, thank you so much for being here. I truly appreciate the work that you do supporting all these families through this.
Honestly, one of life's most emotional transitions.
Well, today I explored the hidden pressures inside caregiving and why aging in place has become such an important conversation.
How care giving burnout affects emotional health and leadership, and why compassionate support matters more now than ever.
What I hope that the viewers take away from this episode is asking for help is not failure.
Preparing for support is not a weakness. And caregiving at its core, is about preserving dignity, connection and humanity.
When families get a lead with compassion, communication and support, difficult transitions become more manageable and people feel less alone inside the process.
I'm Dr. Megan Parks. Thank you for joining me on Align to Lead, and I'll see you at the next time.
